This is the eternal question:
How much should you REALLY spend on an engagement ring?
You may have heard something about how to spend two or even three months’ salary on a diamond engagement ring. Given that the average salary in the United States is around $41,500, that’s between $6,900 and $10,000.
But while ten thousand can buy a beautiful piece of jewelry, it can also add up to serious debt. And the last thing you want to bring into your new marriage is unnecessary financial stress.
So why let the diamond industry tell you how much to spend? Let’s look at the amount you owe actually spend on an engagement ring.
How much to spend on an engagement ring?
Simple answer? Buy an engagement ring that you can fit into your budget, whether it’s changing your lifestyle to save money, borrowing to buy a ring, or simply paying out of pocket with the cash you have.
Don’t let others tell you what to spend on. How much you should spend on an engagement ring is entirely up to you and possibly your bride-to-be (more on that below).
Here are some things to consider when trying to decide how much of your budget you should spend on a ring:
Align expectations with your partner
If you are already sharing finances with your bride-to-be, it would be wise to know how much they think it is reasonable to spend on a ring.
If you find that your budgets don’t match, it’s time to discuss your different money expectations rather than waiting for marriage.
Trying to make your proposal a surprise? You can still start a general discussion about money without directly mentioning the engagement ring.
Buy a meaningful ring, not an expensive one
There are many ways to find a meaningful engagement ring that won’t cost thousands of dollars.
For example, you can:
Yes, the engagement ring is a symbol of love and commitment, and the money you invest in it can contribute to that symbolism. But sinking into years of debt just to buy the most luxurious ring at a dinner party doesn’t mean your lifelong commitment is a great start.
Don’t force yourself to follow the two-month rule
You’ve probably heard the popular rule that you should spend two months (or more) of your salary on an engagement ring. Where did this come from?
Advertising, of course.
The “rule” was established through advertising by the De Beers diamond company throughout the 20th century.. In the company’s advertising, diamonds also became the norm for engagement rings – in the first half of the century, engagement rings contained all kinds of gemstones.
It’s an old rule
This concept is also associated with outdated ideas about gender roles in relationships and society. One De Beers ad from circa 1980s reads:
“Two months salary showed the future Mrs. Smith what the future will be”– assuming the role of the husband-breadwinner (even at a time when this reality has been fading for decades).
We are no longer in the 1950s.
This is not feasible for most young couples.
Today’s young people graduate with significant student loan debtand face tiny entry-level salaries, not to mention the high cost of living.
Almost all women work, and even with two incomes, most of us can’t afford to go from college to married homeowners with kids in less than five years.
Is it worth it to borrow money for an engagement ring?
As I wrote earlier, it is unreasonable these days to think that you will be out of debt before marriage. With the rise of credit card and student loan debt, combined with the fact that we tend to put off marriage, many of us will bring debt with us into our married lives.
Still, the less debt you bring into marriage the best.
To avoid accumulating debt before you tie the knot, consider:
- Borrow only the amount that you can repay within 12 months.
- I’m postponing the offer and saving up for a ring.
- Buying a cheaper ring and paying for it in cash.
What you decide depends on what is important to you and your partner in the proposal – ring style, time, cost, etc.
Remember: wedding rings are a symbol of your love, No measure.
Read more: What financial baggage do you bring to your relationship?
How to set a budget for an engagement ring
Setting a budget for an engagement ring is similar budget setting for any large purchase you want to save or finance.
Follow these steps to figure out how much you can afford each month:
- Enter your total income.
- List your total expenses.
- List your monthly debt payments.
From this information, you can figure out how much money you have to play with.
- Add together your debt payments and expenses to find out. how much money you need to cover your lifestyle and financial obligations.
- Subtract this amount from your income to find your disposable income.
Your disposable income is money that you can spend however you want. You can set aside some of the money for a few months to save up to buy a ring, or use it to determine how much you can borrow and pay back if you want to fund a ring.
Learn more about the do’s and don’ts of financing an engagement ring here..
Don’t Forget the Debt to Income Ratio
Also, consider the debt-to-income ratio (DTI). This is the number that lenders look at when they decide to lend you money, and they usually want to see a DTI below 36%. If borrowing a ring would cause you to exceed this threshold, you may want to delay buying an engagement ring until you have reduced your debt levels.
To find out your DTI, use the MU30 Debt to Income Ratio Calculator.
Popular types of wedding rings
A single diamond ring can be considered a “classic” engagement ring. But as I mentioned above, this trend is about 60 years old and was produced by a diamond company (with, um, small some skin in the game).
If you’re choosing an engagement ring for someone else and don’t know what’s in style, check out bridal magazines for advice – your sweetheart is probably looking through them too. Knowing what they expect from a style can help you figure out what to expect from your wallet.
Notes in the journal of brides several directions that depart from the so-called classical style – and these directions could be more accessible. Consider:
- Gender neutral design.
- Emeralds and other colored gemstones.
- Vintage rings.
How much does the average person spend on an engagement ring?
Unfortunately, good data how much do people spend on a wedding difficult to find.
Most of the data available comes from polls conducted by bridal magazines, usually among trend-following readers. They don’t hear much from your humble Midwestern cousin who invited 80 guests and baked his own cake.
So take these numbers with a pinch of salt.
The Knot reported that the average engagement ring cost $6,000 in 2021, with a third of respondents spending between $1,000 and $4,000 and 8% spending less than $1,000. 2020 study by brides found that the middle ring was worth $3,756.
Should I buy an engagement ring together?
For a man proposing to a woman, the “tradition”—again, established by advertisers in the mid-20th century—is for him to buy a ring and surprise her with an offer.
But relationships and gender roles are much more diverse than this tradition covers.
If your partner is the breadwinner and his income will contribute to the value of the engagement ring, he may want to tell you what you are buying. Or maybe they want to save you the stress of making a decision, or save themselves the frustration of your choice.
Even Martha Stewart confesses There are pros and cons to buying an engagement ring together, so don’t shy away from this option. Feel it out with your partner before making a purchase to find out if they want to participate.
Summary
Whatever you decide to spend, do your homework: Buying an engagement ring online you can save from 40% to 50%.
Also, it’s NOT about the size. Many factors influence the value and desirability of an engagement ring.
Buy now: Go to James Allen, our recommended online jeweler »