There is a scene in Mr. Bean where he, as usual, illustrates his lack of understanding of accepted social customs. Tipping this time. Even after a subtle hint from the messenger, everyone’s favorite English blockhead unable to fix landing.
It’s funny in the context of a goofy sitcom, but a cringe-worthy gaffe in real life. There is a special, sinking feeling when you realize that you had gave someone a tip, or at least should have given them more tips. Even worse, if you skip a tip to someone, like your massage therapist or your virtual assistant, it can hurt their feelings or make them question the quality of the service they provide!
The holidays are a great time to make up for any missed tipping opportunities and show the professionals in your life how much you care about them. But who to tip and how much? When is the best time to tip? And finally, given that everyone’s budgets have shrunk due to inflation, is there any other advice worth giving?
Let’s go through:
- Who to tip this holiday
- How much to tip them
- When to tip them
And more. Without further ado, let’s explore holiday tips!
Who to tip on this holiday?
The first question is simple: who?
The answer is not so simple as some people are legally unable to receive tips. Some even find it offensive!
I once tried to give a generous tip to a rickshaw driver in India, but he frowned and shoved my money back into my chest. As I learned later, in some cultures, offering a tip is considered indulgent; the message received is not “great job, here’s a bonus”, but “you obviously don’t make much money, here’s another”! There are also certain professions that think this way, which I will discuss below.
Read more: What you need to know about tipping in different countries
But let’s start with who you are should tip.
Generally speaking, anyone with whom you have regular contact or meetings would probably appreciate a little token of thanks.
Source: Giphy.com
Keep in mind that it’s hard to pinpoint exactly who expect advice, because everyone is different. But where applicable, I’ve made a note to the pros who, in my subjective opinion, might make a polite, expectant *cough* this holiday season. Later I will discuss how much to tip.
- Babysitting – If your permanent nanny has done a good job, she may be eligible for a small holiday bonus.
- Hairdressers – While your regular stylist may not expect a holiday bonus on top of their regular tip, an extra tip would be greatly appreciated nonetheless.
- Masseurs – Physical therapy can be an extremely competitive field; chiropractors and massage therapists must outdo each other by offering competitive rates, and many are still crushed by student loan debt. Therefore, the holiday bonus for both will definitely be appreciated.
- Amazon, UPS, USPS and FedEx delivery services – Employees of private postal services work hard all year round, but their workload peaks in December. A small gift of drink, food and a tip would be much appreciated. For your information, USPS are federal employees and cannot accept tips, but they can accept gifts under $20.
- Construction personnel – Did the front desk clerk in your apartment deal with extra packages for you this year? Did your service staff respond to your requests? Both may merit a small tip.
- Handymen – Your permanent home assistant will surely appreciate your advice!
- Educators and teachers Whether they are your teacher or your child’s teacher, the teaching staff will certainly appreciate any gift in recognition of their efforts. Tutors you already pay by the hour can receive a cash gift. Teachers, on the other hand, may misinterpret money as a bribe for gold stars; instead, consider a small gift worth less than $20.
- Assistants – Helpers, live or virtual, always deserve a small gift or tip at the end of the year.
- Walkers / Groomers – These industry professionals will provide a valuable service to you and your furry best friend. Give them a tip.
- Housekeepers – Finally, if you have a full-time housekeeper who cleans your apartment, she always deserves a tip at the end of the year.
This is not an exhaustive list, but it should help you find additional helpers in your life that might merit a little holiday bonus.
Now who should not do you tip for different reasons?
Who should not do you tip this holiday (at least in cash)?
Not everyone in your network will appreciate a tip. Some consider cash gifts inappropriate, while others are simply not allowed to receive them. Who makes this list?
Source: Giphy.com
- Accountants – Accountants don’t usually expect tips. Your accountant is already charging you a high hourly rate for work that includes exactly what they think they are worth. If they really did well this year and saved you a lot of money and nerves, a thank you card, a phone call, or maybe a bottle of wine can be appreciated.
- Lawyers – Like your accountant, your lawyer is already charging you exactly what they think he’s worth. It can be said that their “tips” are included in their hourly rate. If they really did well this year, consider a small non-monetary token of appreciation, like the one you gave your accountant.
- Doctors – Doctors are already making good money and may find a cash gift confusing or offensive. If you really feel the need to offer them a gift, make sure they are allowed to receive it; call the front desk to confirm.
- Psychotherapists – Unlike your chiropractor, your psychiatrist, psychologist, or therapist will not expect or perhaps even appreciate a tip.
- Nurses – The nurses in your life, whether they’re a home nurse or an assistant at your grandparents’ nursing home, usually can’t or don’t want to receive cash gifts. Instead, a small gesture like a bouquet, a handwritten letter, or just words of encouragement can make a huge difference to someone that most people take for granted.
It belongs on the no/maybe list. Now that I have considered who tip, how much should you tip them?
How much should you tip them?
Perhaps this is the section that makes you nervous. You would like to tip everyone who helps you in the right amount, especially since you know that things are not going well this year.
But your the budget could be a little tighter, too. In an uncertain economy, you may not be able to save hundreds of dollars in tips on top of your existing travel and vacation spending plans.
So where is the balance (or “tipping point” if you will)?
Calculate your budget
Do you know exactly how much tip money you have to play this year? How about your holiday budget in general?
If you still need to set a holiday budget, the quick and painless way is to download a personal budget app.
Read more: How to budget for holiday shopping
advice that you can
Once you’ve set your holiday budget, you can find some wiggle room for tips. And that’s completely normal.
Remember that the point of tipping is to make someone feel appreciated. The term “reward” comes from the root of the word “thanks”, not “extra money”.
So if you can’t offer someone the full recommended amount of money below, make their gift personal and special. If you can only save $5 or $10, invest the cash in a handwritten thank you card detailing how their services have made your life easier.
So here is a chart with each of the professions listed above, along with recommended tip amounts.
| Assistant | Nice gift, but not too personal, in the $50 range. You don’t want things to get weird. |
| Nanny | One week’s salary (if they work for you full-time) or the typical cost of one babysitting session. |
| pet groomer | Cost per session |
| Man walking the dog | Weekly salary |
| doorman | Between $20 and $100, if there is more than one, split. |
| FedEx or UPS courier | USPS – no cash; snacks, a small gift worth up to $20; FedEx – no cash; snacks, a small gift worth up to $20; UPS – cash up to $10, snacks |
| hairdresser/hairdresser | The cost of one haircut or any other service you regularly receive. |
| home health assistant | Small gift up to $25 |
| Housekeeper | Weekly salary |
| Postman | A gift worth no more than $20. USPS prohibits mail carriers from receiving cash or gift cards. |
| nurses | Thank you handwritten card |
| Superintendent / Technician | $20-$100, depending on the level of responsiveness. |
| Teacher/tutor | A small gift worth no more than $25. Cash is not recommended as it may look like a bribe. |
| Doctors and therapist | Thank you handwritten card |
| assistants | Personalized gift or cash up to $50 |
| Handymen and women | Cost of one visit |
If you can’t afford a big tip this year but certainly plan on continuing to hire someone, this is the stuff to include in a handwritten thank you card. For many gig, core or hourly workers, the promise of continued business can be just as, if not more, comforting than a one-time bonus.
When should you tip them?
Cold logic dictates that the year-end bonus should arrive between Christmas and New Year.
But put yourself in the place of your helpers; whenever you want to get a holiday bonus? Before or after holiday shopping?
If you answered before, you hit the mark. Whether your tip is $50 or just a handwritten thank you card, it’s always best to tip before December 1st for several reasons.
First, cash gifts are much more practical before the holidays. Cash bonuses of any amount can help balance the budget and offset travel and gift expenses.
Even handwritten notes must be delivered a week after Thanksgiving. The reason is that the holidays can be the busiest time of the year, and many tipped professions will work overtime to make the holidays special for everyone else. Thus, words of gratitude, affirmation, and appreciation can provide a good morale boost before the busiest season of the year.
Summary
Advice from professional assistants in your life benefits everyone involved. Whether your tip is cash and/or a handwritten thank you card, practice will help them feel appreciated, help you tighten your gratitude muscles, and strengthen the relationship between the two of you.
Whether it’s cash or not, a little holiday gratitude is what we all need.